Half Man Half Biscuit — Sealclubbing lyrics

Lyrics

I was just sitting there eating a salmonella sandwich
When a man walked up to me
«Would you mind, dear sir, if I asked you a question?
If music be the food of love, are you the indigestion?»
Wo-oh ippee ay oh
Found myself standing 'mongst a score or so of ageing grans and granddads
When a frail voice asked of me:
«Would you mind, dear boy, I just can’t stand all this tension
Please let me in front of you so I can cash me pension»
No-oh ippee ay oh
Frank was going through a state of depression in his bedroom
When he reached out for the jar
He swallowed every last pill and he lay back on his duvet
A Haliborange overdose is perhaps not the right way
To ooh-ooh, to kill yourself
Down beside the babbling brook
I was trying to sketch myself a stallion
When the stallion said to me:
«That's the third biro that you’ve broke and all day I cannot wait
You can lead a horse to water but a pencil must be lead mate»
Ooh-ooh said the stallion
Me and my girl — sealclubbing
Me and my girl — out on the ice
Me and my girl — sealclubbing
Me and my girl — ooh paradise