Adam Sandler — Toll Booth Willie lyrics

Lyrics

Toll Booth Willie: «Welcome to Worchester. Dollar twenty-five please.»
M1: «Hey, how ya doin' Toll Booth Willie?»
Toll Booth Willie: «Good! Thanks fer askin, pop!»
M1: «Aww, that’s great, you know, considering yer a fuckin' idiot!»
Toll Booth Willie: «Go fuck yourself you son of a bitch! I’ll come right
outta the booth and fuckin' whack ya, you fuckin' prick!»
M2: «Hey, hey, Willie! Hows it going?»
Toll Booth Willie: «Hey, can’t complain, pop. Hows 'bout you?»
M2: «Oh, great, great. How much?»
Toll Booth Willie: «The state charges a dollar twenty-five, pop.»
M2: «That's fine. Now should I give you the money, or should I shove the
quarters directly up your fat ass!?»
Toll Booth Willie: «Why you fuckin' hard on! I’ll fucking Carlton Fisk
yer fuckin' head with a Louise-ville fuckin' slugger! Whadya think of that ass fuck!?»
F1: «Hi Willie.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Oh, nice to see ya M’am. Not a bad day, huh?»
F1: «Well, I’m a little lost. Could you help me out? I hear your the
best with directions.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Well I know my way around New England. I can tell ya that much. So where ya headed?»
F1: «Well, I was just wondering exactly which is the best way to drive
up your ass. You know, if you’d tell me, I’d appreciate it, you fuckin'
prick.»
Toll Booth Willie: «You fuckin' bitch! Fuck you! You forgot to pay the
fuckin' toll you dirty whore! I’ll fuckin' drop you with a boot to the
fuckin' skull you cum guzzling queen!»
M3: «Hey Willie.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Hey, how are ya?»
M3: «Here's a dollar twenty-five, and go fuck yourself.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Dah, you fuckin' prick! I hope you choke on a fuckin' bottle cap, ya fuckin' son of a fuck! Eat shit! Eat my shit!»
Bishop Nelson: «Hello Willie. Good to see you.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Ahhh, Bishop Nelson. Nice to see ya. That was quite
a sermon you had the other day.»
Bishop Nelson: «Hey, well I do my best.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Dollar twenty-five, Bishop.»
Bishop Nelson: «Dollar twenty-five, Willie. Isn’t that the same price
your mother charges for a blow job, you piece of dog shit!?»
Toll Booth Willie: «Ohhh! Have another one, you fuckin' lush! It’s not
my fault the bartender cut ya off last night ya fuckin' douche bag!»
M5: «Hey!»
Toll Booth Willie: «Well hey!»
M5: «Yeah, do you want the money, or should I just shove the quarters
directly up your fat ass!?»
Toll Booth Willie: «Well, I already heard that one you fuckin'
unoriginal bastard! Go suck a corn you fuckin' piece of repeatin' shit!»
F2: «Hi.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Oh, hi. How are ya?»
F2: «Fine, thank you. How much is the toll please?»
Toll Booth Willie: «For you sweetheart, it’s a dollar twenty-five.»
F2: «Here ya go.»
F2: «Thank you.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Hey! Hey! Honey! Would you like a receipt with
that?»
F2: «Oh, I almost forgot. Thank you so much.»
Toll Booth Willie: «And here ya are.»
F2: «Umm, do you think you could sign it?»
Toll Booth Willie: «Oh, uh. sign it?»
F2: «Yeah, sign Toll Booth Willie was here.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Ok, sure. Uhh, by the way, what is this for?»
F2: «Just so I could have proof for my friends that I met the biggest
fuckin' dip shit with the smallest dick alive. You understand.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Fuck you, you fuckin' upity bitch! I’ll fuckin' fuck
you and all your lesbian fish-eating friends in front of your fuckin'
mothers! You’re gonna die, bitch! I’m comin' outta the booth!» [Opens
the door and runs out of the booth]
Toll Booth Willie: «Ooooh! My fuckin' leg!»
M6: «Hey! You ran over Toll Booth Willie!»
M7: «Oh my God! I was always wondering what it would be like to run over
a dried up stinky dick licker.»
Toll Booth Willie: «Why you fuckin' pricks. I fuckin' hear every fuckin'
word yer saying!
When this fuckin' leg heals, I’m gonna kick you guys new fuckin'
assholes!